A Parents Resonsibility

Ugh....Parents.....Please stop coercing your kids to do the wrong things. Please stop having people around them that don't mean well. I swear this is the second time my son has come home from his visit away with some implanted craziness.

Don't try and force kids to like or love someone or something if they don't want to. My poor baby sounded completely rehearsed. I have to deprogram him every time. I hate when people try to manipulate kids. Going to pray over my baby for his mental, emotional, physical and spiritual well being. I also need to pray for them....geesh. People need to grow up!

Gwyneth Paltrow talks about Postpartum Depression and more

 You are never the same after having a baby, after postpartum, I was never the same.
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/showtracker/2012/04/thursdays-highlights-the-conversation-with-amanda-de-cadenet-on-lifetime-.html

Mommy

Feeling Spiritually Full

What a great night, BIG conference call. This could be huge for me and my career path. Movie date, great movie...tummy still hurts from laughing so hard. I slept all day so now I am up. I just finished praying and the Holy Spirit is still moving in me. Prayed for my lil one and myself. I can't wait for church on Sunday.

Running Themes of Forgiveness

So, last night was a rough one. I had to try and undo the damage my child had experienced while away from me on the weekend. It was like he was a different child. It was the first time I cried and my heart felt like it was breaking. All I keep trying to focus on is forgiveness and how good God has been to me and my family.

So we went out for a late night talk over Cocoa. We talk and I like always explain to him that there are going to be things he won't understand, but I love him with all my life and to trust me. I never wanted to have to face these talks with my child, but he's smart and he sort of knows something is off even though I try to shield him. I had to forgive him...yes a child for the horrible things he was saying. I know it came from a mean and nasty place that an adult planted in his mind. It's one thing to hurt me, I can take it, but to use a child is absolutely insane.

I pray and bleed the blood of Jesus over my child and myself. That the poison that people posses not continue to spill over into our lives.

On another note.

There we were sitting and talking over our Cocoa and this young lady turns around and looks at me. She kept staring and then called my name. It was the girl I severely  beat up and injured when I was 13 years old. I said hello and then swallowed my heart and said I was sorry. I didn't move from my seat because I was scared. I said it over and over and she said, it's ok. She then turned around and I focused my attention to my child. I could see from the back of her head and the way her friend sat beside her that she was now crying.

I moved to sit beside her and tell her how much I was sorry again and that I hoped she could forgive me. Even though I was a child trying to fit in, I didn't realize how my actions caused her so much emotional pain. She said that after the incident , her life took a downward spiral and her life was hard. I was to blame for that and my heart breaks. I begged for her forgiveness, Lord knows I never intended on messing up her life. I explained that the last time I saw her I was too afraid to say I was sorry, but I needed to say it now. I could tell she needed to hear me say the words, she needed to see and feel that I was truly sorry and I was.  I hurt more now then I ever did, because of the way I treated her and the things I did had such a negative effect on her life. I was glad to her that she was doing ok and I asked her to please keep in touch with me. I really want to connect with her and try and make up for the damage I caused.

I keep this with me since I was 13,I was young and desperate to fit in. I foolishly made wrong decisions that not only physically hurt someone, it threw everything off in their life. I begged for her forgiveness and I ask God to forgive me, I pray that a healing took place for her. I saw the power of what it meant to right a wrong last night, it has and will forever stay with me. We hurt people and people hurt us, if you have a chance to genuinely make it right, do so before it's too late.

Stay Tuned

So many show dates coming up, heart is overwhelmed and I am thankful.

Child Abuse

I hate when people poison children mentally and emotionally and physically, they should be shot. That's all I have to say about that.

A Praise on My Lips and Forgivness in My Heart

Truth needs no defending, this was the word for Resurrection Sunday. God knows and you need not fret. I spent the better part of October 2010 to December 2011 trying to defend the truth. I was labeled crazy, had my physical welfare threatened, my name and reputation slandered by someone who felt it was more important to destroy because of their insecurities. I plead the blood of Jesus on their life, forgive them father for they know not what they do. I don't know how many times I have cried to God asking to place forgiveness in my heart. I have to forgive them in order to find favor in Christ. I will never ever forget what you have done to me and I will use it as a reminder of how not to live my life. People like this still scare me, it's a sick sinister way to have to live.

I am always asking God to protect and shield my lil one and I. I am thankful, the threats from the person and their friends stopped....I am thankful for all the evidence however that showed up at my doorstep. Lord knows if I ever have to go to court, I will be ready lol.

I say all this to say, God will hide you in his bosom. Be faithful and patient and just let God handle the rest.