Ramblings

Talked to Everett, he left me a really sweet mushy note. He has never been one to show that side of him so it was nice. I was nice to be wanted and cared for. He asked about Jackson and said he was going to move us to be with him. I ain't going anywhere unless there is a ring and a minister involved...oh and love would help too.

Have not been feeling my best since giving birth, I have been putting off going to the doctor for a while. Tugging in my abdomen,shifting,tired,scared. I got to live for my son so I need to find out what is wrong with me.

No money,landlord pressing me out, I am so stressed out,not ready to go back to work,need to,will before the year is up. I wish I could stay home and raise my son for a little while longer,feeling sad,want to cry.

Moving was the worst,I had my friends help in the end but it sucked. I moved boxes on a pulley with one had and pushed my son with the other sometimes at 3 am in the morning.I could not leave him alone,would not so he came with me...he was such a trooper. My friends,Ex,Uncle,you all get a shout out from me,thanks for being there.
In the end I like where I live,but long to be in a house somewhere in DC.

So cutie has not called me, I guess no tail means they bail. Dang he was cute,oh well don't want to sin again, so I guess I will just have to be single. Tired of repenting so I just won't sin, but would love for someone to hold my hand once in a while. Someone to watch a movie with or just take a walk. Love is free.

I wonder if he kills me where would he leave my body? How will he do it,pray that my son does not see it happen. So many young mothers being murdered,I want to live. Don't trust,living afraid sometimes. I got to keep praying for protection because he hates me. I have my own conspiracy theory I will discuss later.

I am sad but I may have to give up breastfeeding. Never had the help or time to successfully do it. I had to look for a place, then move to the new place along with no sleep. It seemed like there was something after the other. I look back and I have been going since I gave birth,time flew by so fast.

Tired but this is my only free time to just sit and do nothing or everything. Who knew me, a single mother. I enjoy being a mother and am starting to accept that I am one of millions doing the same things.